Vampires: How To Alleviate Boredom
by Aquen
Summary: The ex-vampire was strangely interested in the worlds bizarre ideas about vampires.
1. Vampires: How to Alleviate Boredom

_I've had this idea for a while and wrote most of the story quite a while ago but today I got around and finished it. Though I should be working on other things... ah well :3_

_I don't like vampires, not at all, but I made an exception for vampire Fai, though I guess that was helped by the fact that vampire Fai wasn't really like any regular vampire. This story was spurred by my dislike of vampires and just kind of... happened... it's random but ah well it was fun!_

**_Spoiler: Takes place after the last chapter of Tsubasa_**

**_Disclaimer: I do not own Tsubasa: Reservoir Chronicle_**

* * *

**Vampires: How To Alleviate Boredom**

It wasn't being in a library that made Fai bored. No, in fact it was actually quite a nice library, with large windows letting in the bright sunlight, long rows and rows of books, it would have been a very nice library if it hadn't been so against comfortable chairs (at the thought Fai shifted uncomfortably in the wooden chair, the most comfortable chair he could find at the library.)

It wasn't the libraries fault at all, but Fai knew whose fault it was, yes he was catching onto the things evil plan.

It was _the book_. Yes, all the books fault. It was the reason Fai was so bored, it was the reason he was so uncomfortable.

The more Fai thought of this the more certain of it he became. In fact the more he thought of it the more things he thought this book capable of.

_It_ was the reason for forest fires, _It _was the cause behind all wars, _It_ was probably behind all Fei Wang Reed's plots. Fai even began to suspect that _It_ was the cause of all the tragic events of his own past.

What an evil book…

"I'm bored!" Fai sighed letting the evil book fall from his hands and land with a thud on the table.

"That's the seventieth time you've said that." Kurogane sighed glairing up over the edge of the book he held and glaring at the mage.

"You've been counting?" Syaoran questioned lowering his book just a bit to look at Kurogane.

"Ever since he first uttered those words." Kurogane muttered then turned his attention to the mage. "Just read the book! We'll never find a way to get the clones back if you refuse to read anything!"

"But that book… it's evil." Fai eyed the book warily.

"Wha? Just read it!" Kurogane grabbed the book and flung it at Fai who dodged it quickly, not wanting to touch something so evil. "It's just a book stupid."

"It's boring!" Fai whined revealing the real reason he thought the book was evil. (Not that he would admit that to himself)

"I'm bored to!" Mokona mumbled from inside the backpack lying beside the table. Apparently the people of this world had never seen anything like Mokona and thus Mokona was banished to inside the backpack.

What a cruel fate.

"One hundred and two." Kurogane replied.

"What?" Fai perked up. "Mokona's said it more times than me!"  
"Mokona repeats you when you say it… expect a couple more times."

Fai's eyes widened in horror and he glared at the backpack. He couldn't have Mokona saying it more times then him…

"I'm bored, I'm bored, I'm bored, I'-"

"Shut up you stupid mage!" Kurogane shouted.

"Kurogane-san…" Syaoran glanced around at people giving them annoyed looks; a librarian shushed them as he walked by and held up a finger.

First strike.

Fai wondered what would happen if they got more. Would they be forced to leave?

That might be nice…

Fai sighed and laid his chin against the table, slumping over it. "I'm bored."

"Seventy four."Kurogane sighed. "You must really be bored; you're acting weird… er"

"I am bored!" Fai mumbled. "Haven't you been listening?"

"I've been trying to tone you out."

"Mean Kuru-pu."

"Mean Kuru-pu, mean Kuru-pu!" Mokona chanted from inside the back pack.

"Shut up meat bun." Kurogane growled slamming his book shut. "Fai, go get the book you're supposed to be reading!" He pointed toward the book lying on the floor.

"But it's evil!"

"Then get another book!"

Fai was silent for a moment before sighing and sliding out of the chair. "Fine, fine Kuro-meanie. I'll go find a less evil book."

"Good riddance." Kurogane growled as Fai left opened up his book to continue reading.

"Haha, Kuro-meanie, Kuro-meanie!"

Kurogane slammed the book down onto the table, startling two girls who were passing. "Now we only have a bored meat bun to deal with."

"Mokona," Syaoran watched Mokona through the open flap worriedly. "Please don't try and eat the backpack…"

* * *

Fai ran his fingers over the spine of the book absently walking down the row, taking as long as possible to get some new book that had the possibility of some hidden secret in it, some way to find the clones.

Why did Syaoran and Kurogane think this library had any potential of helping them in their quest? It wasn't anything special… this world knew nothing about magic or world travel, or clones; it was just some world Mokona had sent to.

Mokona was regretting having brought them there. (Mokona _was_ currently trying to eat out of the prison backpack.)

Even the cloths of this world weren't interesting, just plain t-shirts and jeans. So boring…

Fai sighed stopping in front of the shelf and looking over the books. They all looked boring… boring… boring…

Syaoran was happy they could read the writing of the language, Fai was less than pleased. It wasn't that he didn't want to help find the clones but surely there was some other way than read through such boring (evil) books…

As Fai's eyes skimmed over the books a title caught his attention.

Vampires.

Fai raised an eye brow surprised. This world had a book about vampires? The ex-vampire reached up slipping the book from the shelf and looking at the cover.

At least this book had potential… though Kurogane wouldn't be too happy as this book was sure to hold no information they were looking for.

"Ah well, Kuro-pu can be mad, he's always mad anyway…"

Fai walked away from the shelf heading away to find some place he could sit and read the book at. He couldn't return to the others as if Kurogane saw the book he'd probably take it from Fai and throw it the opposite direction.

Fai found a small nook at the end of a row of bookshelves. It actually looked quite comfortable, with a small table with weird things on top of it, and a semi-comfortable looking couch.

Perfect.

He'd just have to ignore the little kids running around.

Fai sat himself down on the slightly squishy slightly hard couch, opening the book and beginning to read.

* * *

"Where's Fai?" Kurogane slammed his book onto the table making Syaoran jump at the sudden noise. "He's been gone for a while…"

"You just noticed Kurgy?" Mokona giggled, a passing couple glanced down at the backpack strangely as it appeared to chuckle. Syaoran offered them a smile, they quickly left.

"I was enjoying the quite." Kurogane looked around, seeing no sign of the blond. "Geez, he can't just do as he's told."

Kurogane sighed and stood.

"Where are you going Kurogane-san?"

"To find that mage before he does anything." Kurogane pointed at the book he had been reading. "There's nothing in that book, I'll also find another book when I'm looking for the idiot."

"Take me with you!" Mokona cried out.

"No! I'm not carrying around a yellow backpack!"  
"Aww… you're so mean Kuro-meanie."

"Tch." Kurogane turned around and headed off. "I don't need an idiot with me to find an idiot."

Kurogane walked down the shelves looking around for Fai. Where could that guy be? Of course he couldn't just sit still and be like a normal person.

Where could that idiot be?

Kurogane paused at the end of the row glairing around at his surroundings.

Where would Fai hide?

His glare swept to the left, scaring a little kid who ran away from the mean looking guy.

Kurogane watched the kid leave then smirked.

He knew where Fai went.

* * *

Fai chuckled, keeping himself from bursting out in laughter for fear of the older librarian women who was watching him warily ever since his last outburst.

That's where Kurogane found him, sitting on the semi-comfortable couch, a book propped up and Fai chuckling. Kurogane knew he'd be here.

At least he was reading…

"What are you doing?" Kurogane towered over Fai, glowering down at him. Fai froze, his chuckles dying instantly.

He put on an extremely large smile and slowly looked up at Kurogane.

"Kuro-pon!" He said happily.

"It's Kurogane."

"Hehe~…"

"What are you doing?" Kurogane repeated, Fai's large smile meant Kurogane would have to drag the information out of him.

"Nothing… reading… a book…" Fai fragmentally explained, Kurogane continuing to glare.

"Reading what?"

"A book."

"I can see that." Kurogane growled. "About what?"

"About vampires."

"Why are-" Kurogane began to shout but a stern glare from the librarian made him drop his voice till he was nearly whispering. "you reading that?"

"What did you say?" Fai leaned forward cupping his hand to his ear.

Kurogane glanced at the stern women. "Why are you reading that?" He whispered again.

For once Kurogane was scared of someone…

"Because I want to see what this world thinks of vampires." Fai chuckled. "It's very funny actually. They have this romanticized idea about them, here look." Fai flipped back in the book a couple of pages and pointed toward a paragraph. "Here they say that vampires sleep in coffins and can't come out in the sunlight, isn't that funny! And here…" Fai began to flip further back in the book.

He didn't notice the darkening of Kurogane's face. He stood over him his hands slowly curling into fists.

"Fai…" He said darkly.

"Hmm?" Fai glanced up; totally oblivious to Kurogane's barely controlled rage.

"Do you know where you are?"

"In the library?" Fai narrowed his eyes suspiciously. "Is this a trick question?"

"You are in the kids section…"

Fai glanced around, for the first time noticing he was surrounded by thin paperback books and realizing why there seemed to be so many kids in that area. "So these things on the table must be toys?" He leaned in closer to the table, looking at the train toys and wooden tracks. "I see…"

"And you are reading a book about vampires."

"I realize that Kurgy! I'm not totally oblivious!"

Kurogane grabbed Fai's collar dragging him forward. Fai fumbled with the vampire book managing to grab it and held it tightly against his chest before dropping it.

"Ow! Kuro-meanie is hurting me!" Fai complained.

"Idiot, you're not helping our mission, don't you remember why were here?"

Fai frowned. "To read the evil books?"

"Stupid!" Kurogane gave Fai a quick shake. A few kids stared as Kurogane dragged Fai past, seeming quite shocked.

"Daddy's being mean!" Fai pouted.

"Who's daddy?" Kurogane snapped back. He stopped suddenly, feeling cold eyes watching him. He turned slowly, meeting the stare from the stern librarian.

"S-sorry about him." Kurogane apologized before quickly leaving the room, pulling Fai after him.

"Sit here!" Kurogane threw Fai onto the chair, the most uncomfortable looking chair Kurogane could find, just for the idiot. "And read this!" He set down a thick book before Fai. "And if I see you reading any books about vampires, I'll kill you."

"Understood Kuro-daddy!" Fai cheered happily.

"Don't call me that!" Kurogane snapped before turning and walking off toward the book shelves.

"Where are you going?"

"To find a book…"

Fai sat in the chair for a while after Kurogane left, looking at the large book in front of him.

He was wrong about that other book; compared to the first book this book must have caused the end of the world…

Fai hesitantly reached up pushing the large book with his fingers trying to make some space on the table.

Once he had completed that arduous task Fai lifted up the vampire book.

Kurogane wouldn't kill him… hopefully…

* * *

"It's dark! It's dark! Backpacks don't taste good~" Mokona sang in a random tune that changed each time it was sung sang it.

Syaoran had lost track of how many times the silly song had been sung.

Syaoran tightened his grip on the book he was trying to read; trying to ignore the strange looks cast his way.

"It's dark! It's dark! Backpacks don't taste good~" Mokona sang again then went into the chorus. "Fai and Kuro-pu are missing! It's only Mokona and Syaoran~"

"Mokona." Syaoran lowered his voice, unable to take the strange stares any longer.

"Yup, yup Syaoran?" Mokona answered cheerfully.

"You should stop singing; we're getting weird sta-"

"Excuse me." Syaoran snapped his head up. A librarian stood beside the table where he sat, eyes narrowed and seeming a bit annoyed.

"Y-yes?"

"Could you please keep it down, we are getting complaints about you're singing."

Mokona giggled, making the librarian frown even more at Syaoran.

"S-sorry, I'll be quieter."

The librarian gave a curt nod and walked away, Syaoran breathing a sigh of relief.

He reached down grabbing the backpack and hoisting it up.

"Whee~" Mokona giggled. "Fun, fun!"

"We're going to kind Kurogane-san and Fai-san." Syaoran told Mokona. "Please try to be quite."

"Why are we going to find them?" Mokona asked.

"Because they've been gone for awhile, I'm getting worried about those two."

"Do you think Kurgy's finally killed Fai?" Mokona questioned.

"Of course not!" Syaoran quickly replied.

"Really?" Mokona pried.

"Let's try down here." Syaoran ignored Mokona's last question.

He didn't think Kurogane would kill Fai… at least he hoped he wouldn't…

* * *

Fai was again chuckling, though now there weren't as many concerned mothers watching him warily.

Syaoran rounded the corner, seeing Fai sitting at the table. Relief flooded him, so Kurogane didn't kill the mage.

"Fai-san!" Syaoran walked quickly toward Fai who looked up at the sound of Syaoran's voice, smiling widely at him.

"Fai~" Mokona called in a singsong voice.

"Where's Kurogane-san?"

"Him?" Fai's smile fell. "He was disposed of."

"Eh?" Syaoran stopped suddenly. The thought that Fai would kill Kurogane hadn't even passed his mind. "You…"

Fai chuckled at Syaoran's shocked expression, a large smile popping back up. "No, no he went to find a book… he's in league with those evil things." Fai glanced at the large book in front of him.

"I… see." Syaoran wasn't sure how else to respond.

"Hehe~" Mokona popped up from the backpack. "Fai what are you reading?" Mokona asked, noting the book in Fai's hand.

Fai smirked. "A book about vampires! It's really a strange book, these people have so many weird ideas about vampires, they think they live forever and they have a special connection to bats and can change into them!"

"Haha!" Mokona hopped out managing to dodge Syaoran's grab at the white creature to stuff Mokona back into the backpack before anyone saw. "What else does it say Fai?"

"Why do you need to read a vampire book when you already know about vampires?" Syaoran drew closer, trying to block people's view of Mokona.

"I might have been a vampire." Fai said casually, but loud enough for a few people to hear. "But it's very entertaining to see these people's view on them. There nothing like real vampires. I bet none of these people have ever seen a vampire much less been one…" Fai cocked his head to the side, oblivious of the stares he was getting or to the whispering and pointing. "I wonder what Kamui and Subaru would think of this book, their both the real vampires…"

"Uh… Fai-san." Syaoran glanced around at the people. "Maybe we should stop talking about this…"

"What's wrong Syaoran?" Fai gave him a large smile. "Kuro-wan isn't here to stop us!"

"What was that?" Kurogane dropped a large pile of very heavy books in front of the mage making him jump.

"Kuro-sama!" Fai gave him a dazzling smile. "We were just wondering where you were!"

"Are you still reading that vampire book!" Kurogane snatched the book from Fai's hands.

"Maybe." Fai shrugged. "Is Kuro mad?"

"Of course I am!" Kurogane clenched his hand around the book. "You just can't listen!"

He threw the book, Fai watched in awe as the book sailed over his head, craning his neck around to watch its flight.

"Oooh~" Mokona gasped, watching with Fai.

The book slammed against the wall falling down to the ground landing with a thud.

"Hyuu~" Fai clapped. "Nice throw Kurgy!"

"Stop." Kurogane hands shook as he tried not to strangle the mage. "Just. Stop."

"Who threw that?" The stern looking librarian picked up the book, sweeping her glare over those gathered in that section of the library.

"Uh oh!" Mokona giggled.

All fingers pointed back at Kurogane.

Mokona slipped into the yellow backpack, it would be safer in there then to face the wrath of the librarian with the others.

No, Mokona was not a coward….

"Kuro-bad's in trouble!" Fai whispered as he slipped out of the chair tiptoeing away.

"Oh no you don't!" Kurogane reached for the mage grabbing his collar and hoisting him back.

"Did you throw this book?" The angry librarian shoved the vampire book into Kurogane's face.

"Yes, yes Kuro-mean did."

"Shut up mage."

"Excuse me sir," The librarian addressed Kurogane. "But I'm going to have to ask you and your friend to leave."

"Wha?"

"Please, leave." The librarian repeated in response to Kurogane's retort. "We have had to ask you to be quite and behave many times and we have gotten many complaints about all of you."

"Me too?" Fai asked innocently.

The librarian narrowed her eyes. "Yes, you too, all of you must leave."

"I understand," Syaoran interjected before either Kurogane or Fai could respond. "We'll leave."

"Tch." Kurogane growled. "Let's go." He dragged the smiling mage out, Syaoran apologizing many times as they left.

The large doors of the library slammed shut behind them. The group stood on the top of the stairs for a few moments in silence.

"Well~" Fai finally broke the silence. "That was fun!"

"It was definitely _not_ fun!" Kurogane threw him to the side and stomped down the stairs. "And it's all you're fault!"

"My fault?" Fai asked pushing himself up into a sitting position. "How is it my fault?"

"It was all because of your vampire book!"

"That book was actually quite entertaining to read, it made me laugh."

"I don't think that was its purpose." Syaoran sighed.

"Then what could it be for?" Fai questioned. "It couldn't have been a serious book."

Syaoran just sighed again.

* * *

_Well that's finished (Finally!) I had fun writing it so I hope it was fun to read! I was actually surprised I didn't use ~ that often... not that it matters xD_

_I wasn't quite sure what to put for the title, Vampire just seemed to... dull, so I decided on a title that would fit the story better, Vampires: How To Alleviate Boredom, since Fai read the book about vampires as a form of entertainment... yeah it's a weird title :p_


	2. Extra: Heart of a Vampire

_Extra! This story was what spurred the previous one, this one is shorted and darker and not as fun but it portrays my dislike of vampires a bit more... I decided to upload this one with the pervious story since they go hand in hand since this one spurred the other and since they both have to do with my dislike of vampires...though this story ruins the fun mood of the other... oh well..._

_This one is more angsty and the humor tag doesn't apply to this one._

_**Spoiler****: After the Tokyo Arc**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Tsubasa: Reservoir Chronicle**_

* * *

**Heart of a Vampire**

It felt disgusting, the sticky liquid fills his mouth with its metallic taste, slipping down his throat filling his stomach. Or at least it should have tasted disgusting, but Fai found himself slurping up the red liquid, and while he wouldn't say he enjoyed the taste he wouldn't say he didn't like it either.

When he finally felt his hunger sated Fai sat back licking his lips of the last red drops, trying to wash away any signs of blood, of what he had just done. His yellow eye faded back to its normal blue color.

"Some worlds have strange ideas about vampires." Fai stated smirking a bit in his old personality that he had pretty much cast off after the events at Tokyo.

Kurogane raised and eye brow at him while wrapping some cloth around his cut arm, stopping the flow of blood. "I don't care."

Fai smirked, his eyes narrowing. "They say they sleep in coffins, they're immortal, and they can't go out in sunlight. There are all sorts of myths about the 'creatures of the night'."

"I don't care." Kurogane muttered pushing himself up off the couch and walking toward the door to his own room. "We'd best get some rest before we have to go searching tomorrow again."

"In some worlds people romanticize the vampires." Fai continued ignoring Kurogane. "They like the creatures, fantasize about them. Isn't that silly? What's so good about a creature that sucks blood? It's creepy. Don't you think so Kurogane?"

Fai was baiting him; Kurogane knew that, he knew the mage was angry at Kurogane's decision, that the decision to keep him alive was held against Kurogane.

Any normal person would be grateful.

Kurogane glanced back at Fai who still sat on the couch; his smirk held animosity, his gaze hard. As if to reinforce his question Fai lifted up his left hand slowly licking a few drops of blood that had smeared on his fingers.

"Hmph." Kurogane turned around sticking his hands into his pockets. "Better than that freaky smile you always gave."

"Hehe, really?" Fai chuckled giving Kurogane the large smile that for so long had been his trademark.

"Yeah, really." Kurogane growled back. "Now stop smiling!"

"I hate vampires." Fai suddenly, his smile remaining in place. "They are sickening."

"That's ironic, coming from a vampire." Kurogane sighed, he tired of this conversation. It wasn't real, it was forced, Fai was pushing him, trying to remind him of what he had done without the mage's consent.

Fai shrugged, cocking his head to the side innocently.

"Great all we're missing is the white meat bun and your silly nicknames and we'd be back in the past."

"We can wake up Mokona."

"Don't even think about it!"

Kurogane left the room quickly before Fai could continue the banter. Fai still sat on the couch staring at the door even after it was closed.

"Hehe." Fai chuckled, hands tightening around the cushions of the seat. "I still won't forgive you for saving me."

* * *

_And that is all folks!_


End file.
